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May 24, 2023

Listen to Your Resistance

When I was a sophomore in high school, I was beyond stressed; I didn’t know how to manage it. I began to do some research and saw how many people benefitted from mindfulness. So, when my junior year came around, I decided to try different forms of mindfulness in order to manage my stress, which worked exceptionally well. 

From then on, it became a part of my daily routine to meditate, whether it was once for five minutes in the morning, fifteen minutes at night, or anywhere in between. It became a non-negotiable for me.

Years went by and it was still a part of my daily routine. I did it almost daily, except for a few days taken off due to being on vacation, traveling with friends, or the occasional hangover. It happens.

However, something changed within the last few months of my life. I realized I did not have the same desire to meditate every day as I used to. Despite probably hundreds of hours of practice, it actually was becoming harder to just sit down and do it; I met it with more resistance. I wondered why I felt like I didn’t need this tool anymore, but I had the realization that it was because, after years of practice, I actually cultivated a daily lifestyle that instilled the principles of meditation. I’m a more present person than I ever was before, and it was because of all the years of practice. At first, I felt like I was “cheating” if I didn’t do it every day. It felt wrong. 

Now, I realize that I don’t technically need it every day, for my lifestyle is one that inherently practices what mindfulness teaches us: to be present, to be calm, to be collected, and to be grateful. Sometimes it’s ok to break a routine. It might just be a sign that you’ve grown.